And here I am.
I’ve been crazy with work. Crazy with trying to manage my dad. And then I went on vacation.
I wanted my sparkle. That’s what I most craved on my week away. And while the sparkle was not exactly found, the vacation was wonderful. Can’t quite say what the best part of vacation was.
Was it finally making it to the Pemetic summit? Was it the kayaking trip on the bay? Was it Improv Acadia?
I don’t know.
I think the parts I most liked were the parts where my mind shut down. The mornings where we sat in and watched Charmed. Or the nights (okay, just once) where we sat by the water with drink in hand talking and listening to water lapping at our feet.
That’s what I needed. I needed to shut down and not think and not obsess and just let go. I was hoping for some feeling of sparkle and shine. I had this hope that I’d find my creative juices.
But just doing nothing and relaxing and letting go. That was enough.
And now I’m home. And work has resumed crazy. But I can at least remember the happy moments of just a few days ago. That’s what needs to carry me through. I can’t regret what I didn’t do. But I need to relish in what I did do.
It did strengthen my resolve to ramp things up in my own life. Travel around more. Visit more people. Really figure out what it is I want to do in life.
But tonight, I’m taking it slow. I spent the day getting some work done in the house. And now I just need to settle in and do some reading and good sleeping.